Blessings

Hello!  It is the end of January and I am wearing my Adidas capris!  Crazy!  I am glad for the good weather, but there is something about being indoors on cold days that I am missing this year.  I certainly don't miss the high heating bill, but I am craving those cold evenings at home where you get indoors as quickly as possible because it is too cold to go out.  Maybe I am just craving simpler times because when Andrew was small we would get in the house about 4:00 or so and have an entire evening ahead of us to do what we wanted.  Dinner, bath time, homework, television together, stories.  We don't do many of those things together anymore and sometimes it makes me sad. (Well, bath time doesn't make me sad)

So we are having Andrew's Aunt Melissa and her friend Andrea as house guests next weekend. They are visiting from Chicago and will come in on the train.  They are coming to see Andrew play basketball - and I hope they will see some good ball. Andrew and I are so blessed with family on both sides that care for us deeply.  Ron's sister has been a Godsend more than once during the past 10 years and I always worry that the relationship is too one-sided. Not that she ever MAKES me feel that way.  I don't feel I offer her anything.............and I would like that to change. She and Andrea live such different lives from Andrew and I.  Andrea is from Costa Rica and is the sweetest person you can ever meet, but she and Melissa are both city dwellers.  I would like to be able to show them that our life is full here in rural Missouri too, but in an entirely different way.  Basketball games are social events, so they will see we are blessed by good friends.  So here's the challenge, what should I do to help her see the beauty of this small community?  Life appears simpler here - although I don't believe it really is - and there is a fine line between simple and boring.  If you have any great ideas, let me know in the comments.

I have been slowly cleaning over the past few weeks.  Getting rid of stuff that accumulates that we don't need.  I even put away some of the "skinny" clothes I have been dreaming about wearing.  Not that I have given up, but the sheer fact that they are hanging in my closet DOES NOT mean I am going to fit into them.  I need to make small commitments to changing my habits.  I have slowly learned not to cook more than we need for portion control.  I always allow Andrew to have a larger portion and that forces me to eat less.  It helps, but it won't do anything unless I begin to exercise.  Small steps!  Anyway, back to cleaning, it will be nice to have gone through all cupboards, drawers, and closets, but how do we accumulate so much crap?  When I bring it into the house, I feel I can't live without it, but then I never use it!  I have parred down my cookware to 6 pieces.  I have had more, but don't need it.  It is ridiculous!  I am still stuck in the 80's when your measure of success was your stash of things.  I don't want that anymore.  Part of my new vision is realizing that I will not be judged by my possessions, but by the life I lead.  I have had lots of time to think over the past 2 years, and I really had some things wrong.  I had a dream, or vision, of what I thought I wanted my life to be and it was a big, beautiful house, nice furniture, a nice car, and all the things that went with it.  I think that was what I saw when I got married, and didn't realize that it would mean NOTHING without the relationship that was the foundation.  I learned that too late!

I don't want to see sappy or sad, but life teaches us lessons in strange ways.  Now I think more clearly and there isn't anyone to share it with!  I think that is called IRONY!

Until next time, Julie

A New Year - A New Vision

Hello!  OMG it is now 2012! If you had told me 35 years ago that I would be a single mom living in Kirksville, MO raising my only son in 2012, I would have called you crazy!  I had it all figured out in 1977...............or so I thought.  Life has landed many blows to my dreams, but I have muddled through them all and will continue to do so.  This year, my goal is to become even more self-sufficient.  I know, some of you are laughing.  I am already pretty independent, but there is more to life than sheer braun. (Which is pretty much what gets me through - along with my stubborness)  I want to be deliberate and wise in my choices.  I want to get back to basics and focus on what makes me happy, not what I think will make others happy.  I want to be less material and more spiritual - I know, I just bought Ugg slippers!  I had dinner with two of my closest friends over the weekend and I explained it to them like this:  It is almost like I have been living a "temporary" life for the past 12 years.  Now I realize this is my "real" life - and what have I got to show for it?  An awesome son, a great relationship with my family, friends that make me laugh, a job that is a challenge each and every day, and a comfortable home.  I am blessed, very blessed, but find myself wanting something............I'm not sure what.............but something more.  So my vision - find my real life.  Be intentional and deliberate.  Work toward 2013 with the hope of a new reality that makes me smile each and every time I think about it!  Have a great Sunday!  Julie